You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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