is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
