So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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