A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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