The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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