you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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