are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
