i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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