Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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