I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
