I want to have your abortion
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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