She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
