Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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