Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
She told me I should be a condom model.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize
