Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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