He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
it's like heaven, but drunker
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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