Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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