What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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