hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
