its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
