so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
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