I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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