if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize