It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
