do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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