Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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