i don't plan on having that self control this summer
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Dick very happy bro
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
