Porn is love you can see.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Randomize
