rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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