Non-Jews are for practice
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
3 2 1 whiskey
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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