you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
