OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
