Where are you?
In a non slutty way
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
