Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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