We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
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