yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
NoShamevember. You game?
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
