Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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