I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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