bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
