my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
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