Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
