The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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