The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
