you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
