i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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