Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
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