I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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