Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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