I'm drive I can fine osifer
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
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