I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
