I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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