what day is it and did you see me today?
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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