R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
