who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
