you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Randomize
