Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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